Foreword of The Angelic Guide to a Better Terrestrial Experience

A Note to You, written by the VP of Angelic Customs

Hello fellow angel!

On behalf of everyone here at the Angelic Authority on Advancement and Awareness (AAAA), I would like to congratulate you on your most likely upcoming trip to the Terrestrial Plane. Additionally, we would like to thank you for your purchase of this copy of The Angelic Guide to a Better Terrestrial Experience.

There are several great reasons to visit the Terrestrial Plane and even perhaps make a home there. Some of these include:

• Being bored with the kingdom of Heaven

• Vacation

• Visiting loved ones who still live there, whether they live there for better or for worse

• Viewing your own funeral

• Seeing all of the sites and other galactic worlds not seen during life

• Taking a most likely thankless job as one of God’s mercenaries

• Working as one of the AAAA’s many great Terrestrial employees

• Angelic probation

And more!

Whatever reason you may have for your visit to the Terrestrial Plane, we here at the AAAA know how disconcerting and convoluted this trip can feel. This book is meant to be your guide to understanding and working through all parts of the physical universe during your visit.

It is not meant to be read all at once. Instead, you should study it during your down time hours, returning to read and re-read any appropriate passages whenever you need additional guidance.

With that in mind, we have chosen to split this book into several smaller sections. Use the Table of Contents at the beginning of this book to find general chapter and section headings, or the index near the end of this book to look for specific items.

Alternatively, you could just open the book to a random page and see what passages speak to you. The latter method has been described by our test groups as ‘pointless’ and ‘finding a needle in a haystack’, but we here at the AAAA see no reason to hide any possible uses of our book from you.

Please note that the information contained within this guidebook is meant to be generic knowledge for all terrestrial travelers to know. If you are serving as an AAAA agent during your time on the Terrestrial Plane, you will also need to carry a copy of the AAAA Handbook for specific duty-related references.

We have also added in several checklists for you to use when packing, which can be found just behind the index at the end of this book. If you are planning to make multiple trips to the Terrestrial Plane, we recommend making copies of these checklists or using an easily erasable pencil. We have also added in the names and numbers of several angelic retail stores you can use to either purchase or repair goods before you make your journey.

Additionally, we have added in an Amorino Wand for your use during your journey. We highly recommend that you read both the sections on ‘Proper Use of your Amorino Wand’ as well as the section on ‘Proper Etiquette for changing the Terrestrial Plane’ before first using your Wand. Failure to do so can result in inadvertently breaking intergalactic laws set forth by the AAAA as well as the Angelic Penal Society (APS), which will be prosecuted within the highest court allowed by Angelic law.

We recommend that you practice with your Amorino Wand before your journey. Use of an Amorino Wand can be tricky for novices as well as for any angel that has not recently had the opportunity to use one. We have given instructions for use of your wand in the ‘How to Use your Amorino Wand’ section. If you lose your wand, replacements can be purchased from the companies listed in the back of this book.

Upon choosing your destination, you will be offered a senescence-proof terrestrial body for use during your visit. Please note that this body is property of the AAAA. We ask that you not deface it with tattoos or any sort of limb loss. Each body comes equipped with a tracker which we use to recover the body upon your return to the Heavenly Plane. For more information about your terrestrial body, please check out the ‘Your Terrestrial Body and You’ section of the book. Additionally, the ‘Terrestrial Worlds’ section will have additional information involving bodies used to visit specific worlds.

Whatever your reason for visiting the Terrestrial Plane, we here at the AAAA wish you a safe, happy, and successful journey!

Aethereally yours,

Jophiel Melek

VP of Angelic Customs, AAAA